Feeling Hard on Yourself? Try This 5-Minute Compassion Practice

Most of us would never speak to someone we love the way we sometimes speak to ourselves. When we’re struggling, we may become even more critical—exactly when we need kindness most.

Loving-kindness meditation is a simple practice of intentionally offering warmth and goodwill to yourself and others. You don’t have to force yourself to feel loving or positive. Think of it as practicing the intention of kindness, even if the words feel unfamiliar at first.

What Does the Research Say?

Research suggests that practicing loving-kindness meditation regularly may increase positive emotions and compassion while helping people feel more connected to others. This isn’t a magic fix—and one five-minute practice probably won’t transform how you feel. But repeated practice may gradually make kindness and compassion easier to access, especially during moments when your mind naturally turns toward criticism.

Try It Now

1. Get comfortable.
   Sit somewhere you feel supported. Close your eyes if that feels comfortable, or soften your gaze. Take a few slow breaths.

2. Begin with yourself.
   Silently repeat a few kind wishes:

   May I be safe.
   May I be healthy.
   May I find moments of peace.
   May I treat myself with kindness.

3. Picture someone you care about.
   Bring to mind a person who is easy to wish well. Repeat the phrases for them:

   May you be safe.
   May you be healthy.
   May you find moments of peace.
   May you be treated with kindness.

4. Gently widen the circle.
   If you’d like, extend the same wishes to someone you don’t know well—a neighbor, cashier, coworker, or person you passed today.

5. Include someone difficult only if it feels right.
   You might eventually offer these wishes to someone you find challenging. This doesn’t mean excusing harmful behavior, giving up your boundaries, or inviting them back into your life. It simply means choosing not to carry more hostility than you need to.

If certain phrases don’t feel natural, change them. You might say, May I feel less alone, or May I be gentle with myself today.

There is no perfect feeling you’re supposed to create. Each time you practice, you’re simply making a little more room for kindness—toward yourself and, when you’re ready, toward others.